Imaginary Friend
by Maliya Wong
Summary: Four years of poems that reflect my rebellious thoughts and fantasies on Christianity. Some of the poems of this collection have been taken down and published as part of 'Letters to an Imaginary Friend' by SonnyGoten.
1. Imaginary Friend

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	2. Why I said goodbye

_**Note:** This is why I stopped believing there is a God. Even if there is one, there's no point in worshiping Him, because I believe that even if there is a God, He has forgotten humans._

* * *

God, You're bringing me more bad times

is this the punishment for all my 'crimes'

I won't take this

I'll strike back harder

I am smarter

than to believe again.

-

All You bring the world - confusion

just because of an illusion

You never were there in my darkest day

all I've got to say:

-

"So, You're still just toying

don't You know You're so annoying

You call Yourself a God

well think again

You're so not!"

-

"Like I said before

Imaginary Friend

where are all the angels that You sent

where's Your so called Son of Love

people are starting to get enough

they're tired of waiting

keep staying away

and soon they'll start hating

where will You be then, God?"

-

You don't show Yourself to me

like always

there's nothing I can see

still no reply

and that's why

You were just a lie

that's why

I said goodbye.


	3. To xXxkIkOkeNxXx

_Note: This poem is to xXxkIkOkeNxXx , a reply to his or her review.

* * *

_

_**This is xXxkIkOkeNxXx's review:**_

_I have read your two poems thoroughly, and I just have this to say._

_Yes, you do have the right to chose whether to reject or accept Jesus as your Lord and savior, and also to reject the heavenly father. God does give a choice. However, there are consequences for those choices you you will have to learn to live with them._

_I don't understand why you would hate God. Why do people find it so easy to blame God for everything that's going on in this world? God is not responsible for the hatred, the anger, the violence, and the racism. You are. We human beings are responsible for what's going on inÂ this world. And frankly God is getting sick and tired of it. He doesn't have to put up with us. He loves us but he hates the things we've done. I wish people can understand that God is about love. He's not some evil vengeful God who's ready to torture people to death._

_I'm not trying to evangilize you, but you got what God is about backwards. You should really take your time to analyze who God really is before you give up on him. Because you know what?_

_he hasn't given up on you.

* * *

_

You said I had the choice

to let me use my voice

acceptance or rejection

but there never was an option

'cause your Father the Almighty

He just detested me.

-

Why else would I feel like my world is falling apart

it shows that your God never had a heart

at least not for me

I looked and searched desperately

but all I found was misery.

-

Why do we people blame God so easily

simple, because I don't think God is holy.

-

Hatred, anger, violence and racism

you say we are to blame for it

but you also claim that God created all this shit

also known as the world, including you and me

He created everything we do or don't see

that's what Christians claim

so the hatred, anger, violence and racism

is for God to blame.

-

You said it yourself

He created all

big or small

positive or negative

and the way we live

He created all

and that will be His downfall.

-

You said you wouldn't

but if you every do try to evangelise me

I suggest you first analyse me

instead of asking me to analyse your Lord

who left me aside - ignored.

-

And what about this

God hasn't given up on me

it felt like Judas' kiss

He just let me be

I never heard him

never felt him around me

just a fake-Lord I couldn't see.

* * *

_THANK YOU FOR READING. PLEASE REVIEW!_


	4. To Xians Suck

_Note: This poem is to Xians Suck, a reply to his or her review._

**I recently heard something awful happened to Xians Suck. I wish Xians Suck happiness and peace, where ever he or she may be.**

_

* * *

_

_This was Xians Suck's review:_

OK, I'm not going to flame you, I just have an honest. well not really question. More like a thought process to share with you.

Exhibit A) God loves everyone, correct? I'm sure you would say yes.  
Exhibit B) Since God loves everyone, He would not want anyone to go to Hell, correct? Again, I'm sure you would say yes.  
Exhibit C) Many people believe in God without proof. Yes.  
Exhibit D) Many don't. Like me.  
Exhibit E) God is all powerful, and could therefore easily prove His existence to those who don't believe.  
Exhibit F) If everyone believed, they would not go to Hell, and that would make God happy.  
Exhibit G) But, I DON'T believe. And nothing has been done to prove to me that God exists, even though, by Christians' own claims, He could do so easily.  
Exhibit F) Therefore one of two possibilities exist:  
1) God doesn't love me.  
2) God doesn't exist.

See Exhibit A, God loves everyone. Therefore the ONLY possibility is that God does not exist.

I have loads more if that didn't do it for you.

* * *

Xians Suck, something's missing in your story

Understand that I don't want to piss you off, don't worry

But what you say only counts for Christians, not for me

To convert me to atheism, you'll have to use another key.

-

You see, I don't know if there is a God or not

But I do believe that if there is one He forgot

Yes, He forgot us all

He forgot the big and small

And He doesn't love us, His heart is of stone

If He exists, He left us all alone

-

I don't think I want to worship someone who doesn't care

It just doesn't sound fair

And that's why I don't believe in Him anymore

For all I care, He can kiss the floor

-

But thanks for sharing your thought process with us, Xians Suck

To bad, it didn't count for me, but next time better luck!

* * *

_Thank you for reading._


	5. Christmas song

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	6. The winning team

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	7. To PPM

_**This is P.P.M's review:**_

_I don't have statement for you just a question. through all your poems and probably all your stories you speak of God leaving you or abandon you in such quotes like "You were never there in my darkest day" or "God your bringing me more bad times is this punishment for my 'crimes'. I was just wondering what did happen to you? It's said that you can feel a authors emotions by her writings. When I read your poems the first thing I feel is a hatred toward God also some stubbornness and pretty opinionated but, the most of all I feel pain. Did someone hurt you? Were you raised to be an atheist? Did you always hate God? Were you once faithful but, somehow got lose? Would you please answer-God bless you

* * *

_

Between two sides

I'm caught in the middle

What a girl decides

Thoughts confusing like a riddle.

-

Is the Lord true or just a story

I do not know what to believe

But if it was true, al His so called glory

Then yes, I do blame Him for my grieve

For He has never helped me.

-

Did someone hurt me?

Then I should answer, yes and no.

I guess, it's because I feel more lonely

Through each day that I grow.

-

I was raised as atheist

But Granny taught me the goodness of the Lord

And still, nothing has ever happened

That made me I give in to her word.

-

If I am unhappy

When I am lonely

Why can't He ease my pain

Maybe He's just an illusion

And all I said was in vain.

-

But if He truly did exist

I wouldn't want the opportunity be missed

To tell Him what I think of His Mightiness

I would never want to worship aLord

Who never listened to my word.

-

Thank you for reading what I write

I hoped this answered your questions

And that you are satisfied.

* * *

_THANK YOU FOR READING AND PLEASE REVIEW!_


	8. Crucified

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	9. Follow me

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	10. Soar high, Morning Star

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	11. My confession

_**Disclaimer: I own this poem. That's it.**_

_**Note:I confess in this poem, all kinds of things I've done wrong towards Christianity - with a sarcastic tone. It's something I came up with after reading an anonymous review.**_

_**WHETHER POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE -PLEASE COMMENT.**_

* * *

_This is the review:_

This is ... a very hateful insight on Christianity. I hope this doesn't sound offensive, but I want to ask: Why, if you hate Christianity so much, would you bother writing these hate-notes to God and insult Christianity? Of course, you have your right of free speech, but I think that you shouldn't have to glorify Lucifer or blatantly condemn Christianity. There are many people who believe in Christ, and I think that you should respect them (and the Lord).

I mean no offense when I review. I'm just confused at your point of view.

* * *

My name is Maria  
Which is Mary's Dutch version  
Please hear me out  
This is my confession.

I am a sinful human  
I am a disrespectful kid  
I am a loose woman  
I do what people forbid.

I slashed Michael with the devil (1)  
I parodied Jesus' life (2)  
I sent hate-notes to the Highest Level (3)  
And I caused much strife.

I insulted and blatantly condemned Christianity (3)  
I randomly spouted about Lucifer's glory (3)  
And I ridiculed the Bible's content  
For which I shall probably repent.

Here and now I sin  
For I am a sinner  
My lips form into a grin  
For I am only a beginner.

All hail freedom of speech and… sorry? (3)

* * *

(1) I slashed them in a story of mine that I've posted on under my account. Feel free to read.

(2) Also in a story of mine, which has been removed off this website, but I re-posted it, feel free to read.

(3) These are plays on the words in that review.

* * *

_**THANK YOU FOR READING. PLEASE REVIEW.**_


	12. To Obiriani

_**Disclaimer: I own this poem. That's it.**_

_**Note: This poem is a reply to Obiriani's review. Sarcasm is present yet again. The poem is to be interpreted in the way the reader wants to interpret it. My original intention was to confirm if Obiriani caught the sarcasm in my last poem, but err... not exactly the way it turned out to be. Oh well, just enjoy yourself and don't take the poem too seriously.**_

**To Obiriani: Sorry for offending you, but I just couldn't help writing this anyway. (Bad habit of mine, lol.)**

_**WHETHER POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE - PLEASE COMMENT.**_

* * *

Ever since I posted this poem, there has been a heated discussion on my reviewboard regarding freedom of speech. I am _not_ worshipping freedom of speech!!! What I'm trying to say in this poem is:

FREEDOM OF SPEECH IS PART OF HUMANKIND AND THUS WITH LIMITS. GOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT. IN FACT, THIS POEM IS ABOUT QUESTIONING GOD'S EXISTANCE.

* * *

My dear reviewer Obiriani  
I shall try not to offend thee  
However, I'd like to respond immaturely  
To thy review of freedom and responsibility.

Of freedom I like to sing  
On responsibilities I am not keen  
But then  
I am not a mature human being  
I am but a teen.

My sarcasm in my last shot,  
did you catch it  
I believe not  
Otherwise I believe  
you wouldn't have called me 'kid'.

Now, other readers will wonder  
What does this have to do with Christianity  
Do not ponder  
I shall explain to thee.

We were speaking of freedom  
Which has been given by whom  
Exactly: the Lord  
Then why not speak my word  
Enjoy freedom to its fullest extent  
For enjoying what has been given  
For that we should not repent.

Or maybe you don't trust God  
does the Lord joke with mankind  
Is freedom a play on our mind  
What is the answer we find?

We shall see.

* * *

_This is Obiriani's review:_

Mature persons and mature writings do not hide behind cries of "freedom of speech" without fuly accepting the accompanying resonponsibility...  
Freedom of speech is not a god. It is not without limit. There are many limits on it... because it is a human legal construct, not a divine construct.  
Freedom of speech is a good thing, as long as the accompanying responsibility is acknowledged and respected.  
Only very young children, with no inherent integrity (because they are not yet capable of it) constantly cry out for their rights wihtout any willingness to accept their responsibilities that go along with those rights... yet that is what we see more and more of in modern society... grown people who have not developed beyond the state of very young children in their intellect, their emotional reactions, their moral sense, and their general maturity.  
Anyone who cries out about "rights" or "freedoms" without crying out just as loudly about "obligations" and "responsibilites" is not a mature and developed human being whose word commands respect.  
Take care.

* * *

_**THANK YOU FOR READING. PLEASE REVIEW.**_


	13. But I still call you Father

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	14. That's my way

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	15. The Quest for the Rainbow, part I

_**Disclaimer: I don't own the Bible, but this poem is mine.**_

**Note: This poem is based on a story of mine called: De tocht naar de regenboog. The story was written for a competition called: Schrijf Je Reis. Since the story, and thus this poem too, are somehow linked to the Bible, I thought, that I should post the poem in the Bible section.**

SUMMARY: Two brothers from far away are chosen for the quest that shall lead them to the rainbow. They must bring it back to their barren lands, so that it may rain again.

* * *

In a land far, far away  
they lived day by day,  
working on dry, barren lands of misery,  
the two brothers, Sif and Yngvi.

But today not,  
for today gathered the lot  
on the Day of Convention.  
Left, right, they felt the tension.  
And forward came she.

She commanded: "Sit."  
The group did as she bid.  
And she spoke to the lot:  
"Pray to God,  
our lands are arid!"

But then, confronted was she  
by a man, very unhappy.  
"I have prayed for years,"  
he said. "But it appears  
that God does not hear!"

The whole lot agreed,  
but she already wished to proceed.  
"Silence," she urged with need.  
"For God has said,  
two shall go ahead  
and return to our land  
with the rainbow in their hand."

And Sif's surprise did show.  
"Brother, what is a rainbow?"  
But Yngvi too did not know.

Yngvi rose and questioned:  
"What was that you just mentioned?"

And she said: "Young lad,  
This may be sad,  
but before your day,  
the rainbow went away  
therefore you don't know  
God's colorful show  
known as the rainbow."

* * *

_**THANK YOU FOR READING. THERE WILL BE NO PART II. THIS POEM IS OFFICIALLY DISCONTINUED.**_


	16. King

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	17. Song of the Sins

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


	18. Farewell

This poem has been taken down, revised and published as part of the epistolary verse novella **Letters to an Imaginary Friend** written under my girlfriend's pen name _SonnyGoten_.

My apologies.


End file.
